Ah – can you feel it? The new year approaching? Most is a bit rested now, and I think for almost everyone (almost) there is a sense of excitement. The New Year is a shining present filled with new sunrises and sunsets; new beginnings and a level of freshness.

Now is the time to write down all those New Year’s resolutions. Going to the Gym, losing weight, taking better care of yourself, being more positive, doing some self-healing, being more patient – the list is endless and all done with the purest of intentions. Yet – in the back of our minds and based on past experiences we also know that daily routine and living can evidently get us back into old ways. Our starry-eyed resolutions can just as quickly fade away and trigger our old and familiar bad habits.

Unfortunately this is not just based on our New Year’s Resolutions, but can occur multiple times throughout the year. We can start something with all excitement and the moment we get triggered, or get some opposition, or the challenges seem a little bit too much – we revert straight to our comfort zone where we feel falsely protected.

I have nothing against New Years resolutions. In fact, I actually quite like them. I do however just want our resolutions to be realistic and become more of a lifestyle, in general.

My dad used to say: What you do on the first day of the New Year is an indication of how your year will go. I like that idea. I found myself washing my semblance of white-ish flip-flops on our camping table and felt extremely proud of myself that year. Although this was a very long time ago, I can still remember that day better, than some of my other less productive and most headache-y days.

So how do you see 2025 folding out for you? What expectations do you have? From yourself and others?

At the end of every year I like to reflect on the year that was; and then subsequently, on the 1^st day of the new year – I want to put it all behind me. Done. I mentally let go of all the hurt, anger and baggage that dragged me down and made my shoes so, so heavy.

As for activities: as much as I find it extremely tempting to try and stay awake until midnight to jump into the pool – I am more keen to wake up early and drink a nice cup of coffee, while watching the sunrise, though. What better way to dust off the past, than with a bright new day?

So, today I want to summarize some things that I have learned in my own life, challenges and internal conflicts throughout this year. Maybe, just maybe – you can relate to some of these things. (wink-wink)

A year of Learnings

1. There is a difference between living a considerate life and living a life based on other people’s expectations. The one is fulfilling – the other will constantly leave you confused and in doubt.
2. Be honest with yourself. Confronting certain truths about yourself, where you are in life and where you want to go – does not have to be soul crushing. It’s a platform to work from. Without it – you will just be blown in all directions
3. Stop being so afraid of making the wrong decision, that the fear almost forces you into making wrong decisions or no decision at all. Make a choice – and actively do something everyday to make that choice work for you. No matter how small.
4. ‘Walk’ slower. I don’t mean physically necessarily, but mentally. Be present. Try to be patient with people that are different than you. Be merciful in your annoyance. Look around you and notice the things outside of you and your problems. Work to enjoy every single moment.
5. Doing the same thing over and over again, will only give you familiar results. If you are okay with that – by all means. Although, I’m suspecting that most of us strive for improvement – so choose and do something different if you want different results.
6. Get out of your comfort zone. I know that it’s easier said than done, because we don’t always realise that it is our comfort zone. But, do something non-toxic that makes you feel a bit uncomfortable. And see if you can actually survive it. (Spoiler – you will 😊)
7. Take accountability for your actions. Whether it’s years ago, last year or yesterday. Accountability does not mean you have to punish yourself and feel bad for a prolonged time. It just means you say: Yeah, I shouldn’t have done that. Acknowledge it, sincerely apologise if necessary, and thereafter move on with some insights gained.
8. Running away from, hiding from or avoiding your issues does NOT resolve it. It clings to your soul and bitters your heart. Confrontation does not have to be a battle or fight; and what hurts now, will not hurt forever.
9. Stop expecting other people to keep on ‘saving’ you. Every single person on earth can stand on their own two feet if given the opportunity. Is it easier for someone to sweep in when we feel a bit helpless? Sure – but then you will never grow or get to set a good example for others who does not have the same access to constant human-saving.
10. You are not a victim. You deserve more than a life of pity. From others and yourself. You are an active participant in your life and its consequences – good and bad. The sun always comes out after the rain.
11. Do not live in a relentless state of guilt. Do not allow other people to constantly make you feel guilty – or your own inner voice. Conviction is a light touch guiding you in the right direction. Condemnation is holding you a prisoner of guilt. Do not manipulate other people into guilt, either.
12. Get your mind off yourself. Do something for someone else – not just the people you like and love – but the people you don’t much care for, as well. Be a little bit considerate. Too much self-focus makes your heart a sponge-bob heart. All heavy and squishy.
13. Pride comes in many different forms. All bitterness, anger, easily offended and insecurities are linked to our ego’s and how we wish other people perceive us. Being aware that we all play a role, and as important as you want to make yourself look – true internal humility is what helps us to be stable.
14. Share a bit of your true self with people. Just a little bit of yourself. People can relate to other people’s vulnerabilities. To show some weakness – is not the end of the world – with weakness, comes strength.
15. And last – but most definitely not least. Even if you forget everything else, please remember this: The New Year will most definitely have good moments – treasure them. The year will also have some bad moments and some challenges. Both of these things will happen. Your attitude will make all the difference. Your perspective will make things bearable or enjoyable. Not what someone else brings out of you – your own attitude. And this is guided by simply being grateful for all the little things you have and all the graces you’ve received.

I hope that we all walk into the new year with hope, laughter and a positive attitude. And start each new day of each new month in a similar manner. I hope you can all share the sunrise with me tomorrow – with a nice cup of coffee and a silver lining in the clouds.

Happy New Year dearest friends!