And here we are, almost at the end of 2024 on Christmas eve.

Some of you are away on holiday. Others are resting at home. Some are working throughout this time period. There will be a mixture of excitement for most, but some might be grumpy with all the celebrations.

For some of you, there will be an empty seat at a table that was filled last year. For others, it will be the second year or more, and it does not get easier. Some will be joyful with another warm heartbeat at the table or the prospect of one joining in the new year. And for a couple of people – it will be a lonely evening of isolation.

I don’t want to live in the past. I think we sometimes try so hard to go back to how things were – it’s wasted energy. The world turns (yes, I do believe the earth is round-ish) and nothing stays the same, so it seems a bit of a futile attempt. But I did take some time to reflect on all of my past experiences over Christmas and I have had quite the variety of them.

I have spent amazing ones with my BIG family filled with laughter and joy. Some I spent with just the close family. I have been in an absolute foul mood and blissfully happy for others. Some Christmases I spent with people, who are only memories in my life now; and others I spent with people that still know me to my bones. I have also spent some Christmases entirely alone, while being on standby. Yes – I have been all over the spectrum when it comes to Christmas.

This year, I am on standby, but I have a filled house. It took me a full day of working and 10 seconds after getting home yesterday – to appreciate the first half an hour I normally have to sit in silence. It took me 10 minutes after that, to be grateful that I have the noise and demands right now – for it will not last forever.

The one thing that I came to realise has the most meaning for me on Christmas, whether it’s with people or alone, is when the focus was not on me.

I heard an amazing message last year and I do not ever want to forget that message. We tend to romanticize the Christmas time. It is filled with glitter and lights and wrapped it in pretty paper. We laugh and eat and celebrate. But in that process, we forget that the story – was in fact not a pretty story. It was the first chapter of something that that had so many ugly parts in it. And the reason why it had to happen in the first place, was because of our own nature. It was cruel and raw.

However – the way that it started with baby Jesus in the crib and the way that, the chapter ended was based on pure humility and absolute hope.

Humility and Hope do not need to be wrapped in glitter and sparkles. It needs no big serving dish with a side of baby potatoes. It is unassuming, so painfully patient and comes accompanied with love. When we sometimes struggle to fully understand the meaning of love for those we don’t know or like – I find that mere consideration and acknowledgement helps – without expecting anything in return.

Christmas is an emotional time for almost everyone. Weird, isn’t it? It can be because our hearts are so filled – it overflows. Or because it’s a reminder of things that we lost or not yet gained. Christmas always comes with some self-reflection. This year sits a bit different for me, though. There is a bit of a dark cloud hanging over so many people I know right now. So many changes that creates worry and fear. A whole lot of uncertainty for the future.

It’s easy to have trust, when things are going your way and you are seemingly getting what you want. It’s a lot harder to trust, when the opposite is a reality in your life.

And that is when we need to trust even more that things will work out for the best (not based on our wants), despite the bumpy road we are on. In humility and hope and why we believe in Christmas. Past the sparkles, bows and glitter – into the raw and real. And every message of hope that came after that from people that went through so much more than we are. We need to hold on tightly to that message.

So, my wish for everyone tonight is to enjoy exactly what you have right now. To celebrate with family and friends. Or find small joys if it’s just you – don’t hold on to that loneliness, bitterness or what was.

And then, take a moment to step away from everything else.

Close your eyes in solitude – just you and your heartbeat. Humble yourself and think for a moment not about yourself and your circumstances – good or bad – but why and what we celebrate on Christmas. Not because we want to live struggle-free lives. Not because we want so desperately to be comfortable. But because this day is so much more and bigger than our own understanding.

The message was humility, hope and love. Everything we have in life is because of grace, even if sometimes we do congratulate ourselves a little bit too much. Or have moments of self pity. We all have a purpose. A very different purpose for each one – but as long as we are breathing – there is a road ahead and we keep moving forward.

I hope that everyone will look for and find a sense of peace tonight and tomorrow. And that we spend it, not focused on ourselves – our struggles or our successes – but in humble gratuity. And then we get to share it all around us.

Merry Christmas friends!